Monday, January 19, 2009

Windy Days Really Bite

I have one thing to say about today: I HATE WINDY DAYS!!! Where is the justice in the world if the sky is clear as the ocean with not a single, puffy cloud in sight and the wind gusts are so powerful that they almost knock you off of your feet!! It's not fair I tell you!!

Anyways....despite the wind I still forced myself to take my daily walk. On this particular morning I was not at all keen on the idea of walking past the neighborhoods, so I decided to walk about 2 miles around the middle school track. Due to my obessive complusive need to exercise (darn you ED!), I walk twice a day around my town for 30 minutes each. In fact, I have logged so many miles in my pair of tennis shoes (which reminds me I need a new pair) that practically everyone in this area knows me. It can really be unnerving when a total stranger comes up to me out of the blue while I am in line checking out my groceries, or working out at the rec center. The conversation usually goes like this:

Weird person: "You look really familiar, do I know you?"
A very nervous Me: "Uh...nooooo..."
Weird person: "I know where I've seen you! You walk in____all the time!"
A now sheepish Me: "Uh, yea, that's me. Always walkin', I just like to walk."
The weird person and I usually introduce ourselves, and then I am quick to disappear the next second I get.

This used to be embarrassing....now it's just annoying.

So after braving the winds, I returned home and made myself a truly delicious lunch. For some reason I have really been battling the choice to let go of my ED or to hold on to it, even though I know I am doing pretty well. I don't really want to go back to being super skeletal all the time, and I can now admit (though hesitantly) that I actually like to eat. It feels so wrong saying that though. But lunch made me feel better and helped turn my mindset around, so that was a huge positive. There are parts of me that do want to get better, just not all the way (or weigh) yet. But it's a start.

Here's todays eats!

Breakfast
2 Wheetabix biscuits
1 c Unsweeted Silk Soymilk
6 almonds
1 Fuji apple (mmm...apple)
Container of Cascade Organic Strawberry Yogurt (seriously good)

Morning Snackish
Few slices of yellow pepper
1/2 c Blueberries


Lunch
French Toast! made with
2 slices No Salt Bread
2 TB Pumpkin
Cinnamon to taste
2 TB Silk Lite Vanilla
1/2 c Eggwhites (I have officially given up on Vegan French Toast, plus I think that my ED was trying to trap me by getting me to cut out non-vegan proteins)
1 TB Peanut Butter
3/4 c Assorted Veggies
1 fuji apple

Snack
1/2c Oatmeal
1 TB Almond Butter (omg! So I decided to splurge and buy this today and wow!! This is suuuuper good! The consistency is like a soft, fluffy pillow and the taste is a delicous, nutty flavor! Wow! I may never go back to the PB again!)
1/2c Blueberries
1 c Silk Lite Vanilla

Dinner
6 oz of Tofu mixed with
1 TB of Nutritional Yeast
1/4 of a small Plum Tomato
Dried Chives to taste
3 chopped mushrooms
2 TB Low Sodium Vegetable Broth
5 Melba Toast Wheat Crackers
3/4 c Assorted Veggies
1 fuji apple

Well I'm hungry so I'm gonna eat my dinner now and then I'm going to hop on over to the rec center for a good workout. That is, they had better be open today!!

2 comments:

Kiki January 19, 2009 at 5:05 PM  

Sorry to hear that ED forces you to exercise. Have you ever tried yoga? IT might make ED happy because it's exercise, plus it calms you down so you won't get obsessed with burning lots of cals.

Delish food today! I love almond butter!

Jess :) January 19, 2009 at 5:20 PM  

I second the yoga thing! It really makes you work, and you feel great, but you aren't burning 100s upon 100s of cals... but anyways, you should maybe try to distract yourself. Like rather going to the gym, maybe do some art? I don't like the wind either!!! Going to the gym and all is not unhealthy, what's unhealthy is becoming obsesssive about it. Thanks for the comment btw and love your foodies :) Keep staying strong :)
<3 jess :)
xxx