As promised, here is the recap of my lovely night of salsa dancing.
I think three words will pretty much sum up the entire night
It has been far too long since I have gone out for a night of dancing!! I think the last time I went was for my senior prom but that was in 2007!! I'll admit I was a little (scratch that) A LOT nervous about the night. For one there were TONS of people. I tend to get very anxious in large crowds which I think is partly due to ED making me feel insecure about my weight and everything. I did struggle with body checking and comparison for some part of the night but eventually I was able to just relax and have a good time.
I think part of the reason why I was "feeling fat" (ugh) was because I am still wearing baggy clothes which really do not fit me that well. Ever since being discharged from the hospital I have taken to wearing loose-fitting clothing because I am so insecure about the changes in my body. Even though now I have to regain a lot of weight I am still insecure because my body is still out of shape.
But enough of this downer-mood!! On to the fun!!!
I can't even begin to tell you how great of a time I had. First we learned the basic moves: stepping to the beat, pausing on the 4th and 8th beat, and twirling. Then the instructors set us loose and we were on our own, dancing the night away. Once you know what to do salsa dancing is actually not that hard. There are a lot of more complicated, fancy moves but everything is in time to the music so it's really easy to pick up. I actually learned how to do a side step, a double twirl, and a cross-over.
For most of the night I ended up dancing with my friend's brother. I was SUPER nervous being that close to a guy, but he was pretty cool and was a great dancing partner. Plus I think that he likes me, but don't say anything. Shhhhh.....I also danced with one other guy. OMG!! It was so creepy!! Suddenly this middle-aged guy who was about 30 or 40 came up to me out of nowhere and asked me to dance. I could've/should've said no but I didn't want to be rude. He kept smiling at me the whole time while we were dancing together and tried to teach me some new moves. I hated touching his hands because they felt like a warm, soft marshmallow. Shiver..... The whole time we danced I kept shooting my friend's a look of pained desperation to just "PLEASE RESCUE ME!!!" I was afraid that he was some kind of pedophile who was going to molest me or stalk me. It was realllllly creepy. When the song ended I literally RAN back to my friends and hid from sight. Ugh...even remembering it still makes me feel uneasy.
But now for the BEST PART OF THE NIGHT!!! Here's a little background before I tell you
When I was a little girl I dislocated my shoulder in gymnastics while doing a flip on the high bar. Ever since then I have to be careful about how I use my right arm because it easily dislocates again if I move it in the wrong way. Seriously, I can't put my arm behind my head, serve a volleyball, or even jump rope--it is THAT bad. During the worst days of anorexia, my shoulder was especially bad and would frequently come out. I couldn't use it at all! When I heard that we were going salsa dancing you can imagine how nervous I was. Right away I told my partner that he couldn't twirl me with my right arm. Well, he FORGOT!! When he spun me around for that first twirl I immediately envisioned a crippled me lying on the floor, arm loosely dangling from its socket.
Oh the pain! Oh the misery! Oh the woe! It was surely DOOM'S DAY for this gal.
But to my surprise---NOTHING HAPPENED!! I was so shocked!! In fact I didn't even feel any pain or the usual tightening in my shoulder muscle like I usually get. I am so happy to say that I ended up twirling the entire night with my right arm and it didn't come out once!!! I guess the weight training that I started this summer has really payed off!!
Tomorrow I am going to post about an amazing revelation that I had this Sunday (sry I'm a day behind but Sunday was so HARD I didn't have the energy or the heart to post). It's about what to do when we are faced with an attack from our ED's. This literally blew my mind! I can't wait to tell yall! Plus I am including a tribute to the most skee-rumptious, dee-lishious, bangin' bowl of oatmeal EVA!!
G'night and a domani!